Windmills in My Mind

A List.
Further proof of why I should be self-employed (I spend my day pondering minutiae instead of being useful). Work with me-- these are ramblings, not logic-driven observations.

• (as a child) I never thought I would live past the age of 28. I was convinced that I was destined to die young, and so I made a lot of stupid-ass decisions based on that conclusion. Why 28? Why me? Dunno... I guess my dramatic little soul couldn't perceive something sadder than to be smited "so young"...
  

• (as an adult) I never thought the day would come that I could say, "I haven't had sex for an entire year." FYI: Dates with B.O.B don't count; they only tidy cobwebs short-term..

• If someone ever asked me, 'Have you considered suicide?" I'd have to say yes. Yes, I considered it, thought about what an absolute waste it would be, and went back to thinking about the problem that first made me think about suicide. Thought about it? Yes. Considered it to be an acceptable / viable option. Nope.

• One of my favorite anonymous memories? Riding on the Metro in DC with about 3,000 touring Girl Scouts. As a friend and I entered the Metro station, we were swarmed by countless like-dressed girls, ranging in age from 5-15, being herded toward their trains. We had just visited the Holocaust Museum, and I was in a broody state of mind as a result. So the thought of being immersed by a sea of shiny-happy folks was NOT on my agenda. Shortly after the train left the station, a group of Scouts started singing, "The Alligator Song"- a longtime campfire standard. Before I knew what I was doing, I was standing with the Scouts, bellowing along at the top of my lungs: THE ALLIGATOR IS MY FRIEND... HE CA-A-AN BE YOUR FRIEND TO-O-O-O-O-O-O-O... I'D RA-A-ATHER HAVE HIM AS MY FRIEND... THAN WEAR HIM AS MY SHO-O-O-O-O-O-OE!.... A-A-A-A-A-A-A-ALLIGATOR..... A-A-A-A-A-A-A-ALLIGATOR!!!